April 9, 2024

Funnier than Chuck Norris Jokes…… A great ad campaign by Dos Equis beer highlighting the exploits, skills and endeavors of The Most Interesting Man In The World:

He’s won trophies for his game face alone.

He never says anything tastes like chicken, not even chicken.

His words carry weight that would break break a less intersting man’s jaw.

He bowls overhand.

He is the life of parties he has never been to.

Sharks have a week dedicated to him.

If he punched you, you’d be fighting the urge to thank him.

He has been known to cure narcolepsy, just by walking into the room.

At museums, he’s allowed to touch the art.

He’s not afraid to get in touch with his feminine side….. if he had one.

He once buried a time capsule full of things that haven’t happened yet.

If he disagrees with someone it is because they are wrong.

His organ donation card, also lists his beard.

He owns five one-of-a-kind cars, and has spares of each in his garage.

All of his questions are rhetorical.

He once put out a fire by telling it to go away.

He has been pronounced dead 7 times…make that 8.

Was once found guilty, of being innocent.

His bear hugs are actually hugs he gives to bears.

He’s a lover, not a fighter, but he’s also a fighter, so don’t get any ideas.

When it is raining, it is because he is sad.

His reputation expands faster than the universe.

His personality is so magnetic that he cannot carry credit cards!

He once gave an autograph in sign language.

People hang on his every word, even the prepositions.

He could disarm you with his looks, or his hands either way.

He can undeniably prove that the Bermuda Triangle is, in fact, a parallelogram.

He can speak braille.

Stray dogs obey his commands.

The Spanish Civil War was started by two women fighting over him.

He didn’t just taste fear… he ordered seconds of it.

His eye color varies depending on the lighting.

He once had an awkward moment, just to see what it felt like.

He lives vicariously through himself.

Waiters tip him.

Restaurants offer him his usual table, even if he’s never been there.

Happy Hour is the hour after everyone from happy hour has left.

He sleeps with a night light, not because he’s afraid of the dark but the dark is afraid of him.

Even his parents’ advice is insightful.

When he wakes up the roses smell him.

He has never lost a sock.

Even his enemies list him as their emergency contact number.

He’s won the same lifetime achievement award – twice.

If there were an interesting gland, his would be larger than most men’s entire lower intestines.

His shirts never wrinkle.

It is said that the sun rises later on may 6th in case his cinco de mayo parties run later than planned.

You cannot buy him, but occasionally trimmings from his beard come up in auctions.

He holds a doctorate in originality in which he teaches at Harvard where no one ever passes.

When he looks in the mirror there’s never a reflection because he is only 1 of a kind.

He is left-handed. And right-handed.

Even if he forgets to put postage on his mail, it gets there.

He once knew a call was a wrong number, even though the person on the other end wouldn’t admit it.

You can see his charisma from space.

Bulls flat out refuse to fight him

Whatever side of the tracks he’s currently on, is the right side. If he were to cross them, he would still be on the right side.

he once taught a German Shepherd how to bark in Spanish.

The pheremones he secretes have been known to affect people miles away in a slight, but measurable way.

He can speak French, in Russian.

He was once bitten a Peruvian Chimpanzee. Never heard of them? That’s because they’re extinct.

The police often question him, just because they find him interesting.

He once punched a magician. That’s right. You heard me.

When he orders a salad, he gets the dressing right there on top of the salad, where it belongs…where there is no turning back.

If a monument was built in his honor, Mt. Rushmore would close, due to poor attendance.

His beard alone has experienced more than a lesser man’s entire body.

His blood smells like cologne.

The Mayan calendar predicted the exact date of his birth.

On every continent in the world, there is a sandwich named after him.

He doesn’t believe in using oven mitts, nor potholders.

His cereal never gets soggy. It sits there, staying crispy, just for him.

His pillow talk is years ahead of it’s time.

Respected archaeologists fight over his discarded apple cores.

He is The Most Interesting Man In The World.

“Find out what it is in life you don’t do well, and then don’t do that thing” – The Most Interesting Man In The World

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